...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Randomize
