I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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