We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
