after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
