I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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