Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Randomize
