Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
