you win again, gameday.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
