And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
