I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
