Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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