You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
