I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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