i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
