I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize