He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
