Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
