Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The air was thick with penises
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
