Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
