I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
