He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
