thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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