How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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