If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize