okay pat passed out under dana's car
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
