actually, I'm a sock model
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
