just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
