I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize