So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
