I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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