Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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