I'm really into asian looking animals
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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