Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
