Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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