Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize