So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
