I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
