my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
My vagina is very pro this idea
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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