Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
