but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
