bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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