Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
