Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
