Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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