Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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