So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
