Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
