woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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