I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
