I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
