will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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